Wednesday, April 02, 2014

Heads rolling

Try to imagine the two goofiest people on earth trying to solve a problem. It doesn't have to be a big problem really. I'd say give these two people a very simple task and watch OUT for the results. But for me and my friend Graziela there is no such a thing as silly tasks, big or small. We can face them all!
So she calls me to come to her house and get a little pool she wanted to give to my kids. It was summer 1997, perfect time. So i got all my 3 little ones and off we went to get the pool. How exciting! YAY!

It was a very very windy day, and of course I went there all prepared! So the pool was apparently bigger than my huge van. We decided to tie it up on the top of the car with a very silly craft cord. The kids could not wait to fill it up and splash water all over and have tons of fun. Mommy is our hero right?

We were about to leave and Graziela announces that she locked herself and her huge dog out of the house. Hey! No problem, told her to jump in and we could go to her husband workplace and get a spare key. Problem solved.

Along the way Graziela was telling me to drive very careful. Hey look! A speed bump! Watch out while making a turn. Another speed bump slooow doooown. So we decide to go to my house first to leave the pool and then go to her hubby's workplace. And along the way I was driving like a 109 year old with Graziela telling me what to do .

Ah what a relieve! We finally made it, I thought that day would never come. Open the garage door and Graziela told me that I should get the pool out first from the top of the car. She was right. Did I want the pool to get trapped on the garage door? I think not! I got out of the car and when I looked at the top... where's the swimming pool? 

I remember feeling both my legs very weak.  Graziela laughing out crazy inside the car. All along the way of course she told me to watch for the speed bumps and the pool was long gone from the roof! 
I tried to keep calm, my kids weren't happy at all with the whole situation. Their bloody mother managed to loose a pool! A pool! Who loses a pool for christ sake? Worst yet: What if someone drove over the pool? A poor family got a blue pool right on the windscreen and all die carbonized? But Graziela reminded me that perhaps I got someone's head off! Not anyone...a little innocent kid!!!!  I was panicking! And getting close to her house I saw a few police cars along the way. Graziela telling me I should duck down. My heart was racing so fast! I could see a head rolling right close to the stop sign. I could feel handcuffs around my wrists, I had the sensation everyone in that street was looking at me. But then we saw the pool in a corner, very very close to Graziela's house. Sitting there all alone, no head , no body, no police car. Maybe was a trap I thought. Made a u-turn to get that swimming pool that I no longer  desired anymore.
The only way to get it back was to stuff it in the back of the van. Five people plus a huge dog squeezing inside the van and the pool would not fit. So a part of it was hanging outside of the car .  I was so angry that I felt like the incredible Hulk and I bent the pool inside but had no luck trying to shut the back door. But at least my 8 year old could from his seat keep an eye on it while we drove back home. Right?

Driving back home with my dear friend directions and how careful I should be this time! Double careful! More traffic lights, curves, speed bumps. Oh the speed bumps!!! On the third one we heard a huge PLOOOC. To me sounded like a baby being delivered in a cartoon. I look at the mirror and a car behind us trying to get our attention. 

Yes the pool in the middle of the road this time. The guy from the other car came running to help me. I just checked if his head was still hanging in there. Alas I looked at him and he reminded me something or someone. I couldn't figure it out. I was just thankful he was alright because that could have been a tragic accident. I just want to lay down in the middle of the street and had a big truck running over my body. I was tired.
We both squished the pool inside the car. I was no longer angry. The guy turn to me and handle a business card and said:

- Hope one day you remember who helped you today.

I thanked him and got inside the car and when I looked at the card the guy who helped me worked as Santa! Yeah this was living proof that X-Mas in july does exist and so does Santa! Graziela was holding both her hands on her tummy and laughing all the way home. What a joy!

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